I am an Introvert, so I am naturally not inclined to have large circles of friends. Even as a child, I was never surrounded by lots of people. It’s just not my way. I always had one or two close friends, and we would hang out. The same has applied to friendships as an adult as well. These friends understand that I am an Introvert. So they KNOW there are times I won’t attend events, they still invite me. They understand that I love them and appreciate them. They also respect my space and my boundaries as I do theirs.
With all of that said, I pick my friends very strategically. I select friends that are also Introverts or that understand that I am an Introvert [INFJ] and that I am not a hanging out sort. More importantly, they understand, respect me, and they don’t make my unwillingness to hang out about them. They understand that it’s not personal, I just don’t hang out, excessively. They get me, I love that, I love them, and that’s why we’re friends.
I have been lucky to have these people in my life. I wish more people had this level of understanding. However, most people don’t. That lack of understanding, infringing upon boundaries, and general selfishness is one of the many reasons I keep my circles small.
For me distancing myself from people is a last resort and self-protection mechanism against folks that don’t understand my boundaries, don’t have my best interest at heart and/or have displayed some type of ugliness. Distancing is not limited to friends but family as well. I only distance myself when it comes down to protecting my self from abuse, narcissism, toxicity, disloyalty, and various other people inflicted unpleasantries.
The past year has displayed to me how fragile life can be and how we should surround ourselves ONLY with the most amazing people. We should love harder, kiss more, hug tighter, and embrace all that life has to offer. We owe this to ourselves. Hence, why I am very dedicated to living the last fifty years of my life living, loving, and embracing all that life has to offer. That does NOT involve dealing with a narcissist, toxicity, disloyalty, entitlement, greed, and hate of any sort. I embrace ALL of that unapologetically, and I will continue to do so regardless of how it’s viewed and how unpopular it may be. Sorry/not sorry.
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