In Part 1 of my Story Time about my encounter with a Narc, I talked about how they love-bombed me. When I wrote about that, I didn’t mention how they love-bombed my whole ass family. Honestly, I didn’t even think about it at the time because I am NOT really impressed with monetary gifts, and neither is my family. So when this love-bombing of my family thing happened, I still didn’t think about it beyond how sweet I thought it was. I think moving forward, of course, I will be aware of this kind of thing in the future.
My family and I are the least materialistic people you will ever meet. We are not into designer crap. I mean, like really, who cares about contributing to capitalism on that level. WE DO NOT CARE. We are much more focused on spending that earns us ROI. If it’s spending on designer crap in an “Oh, look at the expensive shit I just bought?” we don’t care. Had I been love-bombed with some shares of Amazon, Apple, or equivalent stock, I might have been more impressed. ANY. WHO. My family was actually very uncomfortable with the excessive gifts during Christmas. They were like, “Umm, after the 2nd gift, we realized this was not from you but all about the narc.” We have never celebrated holidays with excessive gifts, so it was foreign to us.
Love-bombing is not used as a demonstration to show how much you are cared about at all. Narcs do this exclusively to manipulate people in an evil and predatory manner. It should be considered emotional abuse. As I’ve said in my previous post, I am not a mental health expert at all, but if it acts like a narc, walks like a narc, and talks like a narc, guess what it’s a narc.
Love-bombing can be one or more of the following:
🔸 Excessive compliments
🔸 Giving extravagant gifts or making grand romantic gestures
🔸 Quick movement for commitment
🔸 Claim to be your soulmate
🔸 Things move really quickly
🔸 They act like they are the answer to your romantic prayers
🔸 They want to know everything about you, in a weird way
🔸 They introduce you to their inner circle really quickly
🔸 Something doesn’t feel right
🔸 They LOVE you
Most of these things actually don’t sound too bad, low key. However, love bombing can lead to trauma bonding. The goal of trauma bonding is to develop a quick ONE-SIDED emotional bond. This type of bond opens the door for the narc to move ahead with their strategic and manipulative plan for verbal, emotional, and sometimes even physical abuse. The goal of the love-bombing is to prepare you with a memory of the good times, so you’re always longing for those times when things were loving.
Dealing with a narcissist is a whole other animal. That’s because who even thinks people are walking around in the world with such diabolical minds and intent. It is frankly surreal, to be honest. As the days go by, the more unreal it seems that people are functioning or dysfunctioning like this. BECAUSE REALLY, WHO THINKS LIKE THIS?
Those who think like this are very broken people. It is sad, but as people who are not broken, we can feel for them, but we must extricate ourselves if we ever happen upon these very diabolical folks. We can feel bad, for whatever childhood trauma, chemical imbalance, or any other issue that caused them to be, broken. However, if you encounter one of these people, RUN, and don’t look back. RUN.
It gets crazier. Stay tuned for Part 3 coming soon. In the meantime, I’ve posted some information about Love-Bombing below.
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