People often ask how you feel. Some people are asking to be polite, and they don’t care. Others ask, but mostly they are just interested in hearing, OK. People rarely want to know how you’re doing.
When asked how I was doing, for the past few months, I’ve answered as honestly as I could, under the circumstances. My answer is usually, ok or I don’t know. Those were honest answers.
Honest answers that work for your peers are not acceptable when speaking with a therapist. That was especially the case during today’s session. When asked how do I feel, I answered by going through all of the things that had been bothering me, but I didn’t answer how I felt.
After listening to me discuss how I felt as if I have so many people pulling at me wanting things that I can’t help them with right now, I got the question again. “OK, how do you feel?” I went with the, “I don’t know.”
I feel connected to my son, my job, the team on my job, and my very close long-time friends. Outside of that, I feel disconnected from everything and everyone. I don’t feel as if the disconnect is necessarily a bad thing or a good thing, it’s just a thing.
I think I am further disconnected because I am an introvert. [INFJ] I currently feel pressured by the expectations of others, that I can’t live up to, which has caused me to disconnect and withdraw even further.
So by pressing the issue, the therapist got me to examine how I feel and acknowledge it instead of doing the lame, “I don’t know.” Examining, facing and unraveling feelings is what I hope to do more of in these sessions,
In conclusion, after the second session, I feel lighter, and I look forward to feeling more so as time goes by.
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