The last therapy session was rough, but I don’t see that as a bad thing. It unraveled some things that made me think. I could never view that as a negative thing. Any growth I can make with getting better connected with myself is a positive thing.
When I finish with each one of these sessions, I take the following week to think about what I learned about myself. Last week was no different. The very end of session 4 ended with a discussion about the parallels between my dad and myself concerning partner selection. There were some distinct parallels that I never thought about until the therapist brought the topic up in our discussion. The ability to bring perspective to something is one of the great things that I’ve discovered about therapy. That’s another reason I think it was the perfect time for me to pursue therapy, at this time in my life.
So, in a bit of a continuation of last week’s session, we discussed HOW my dad’s selection in women was similar to my selections in partners. My dad chose women that were either extremely beautiful or those that were less beautiful and a bit conservative in personality. I selected partners that were extremely beautiful or super nerdy. I never thought about how much my selection was so similar to that of my dad’s. The difference for me was that I never lied, I was always faithful and I never misled them. I don’t know if that was a gender thing or just a personality thing. Either way, that’s just WHO I am. I have never been one to cheat because It’s difficult enough dealing with one personality, let alone multiple personalities.
In the fifth session, we unraveled this a bit and discussed how the women in my dad’s life, while I was growing up, influenced my relationships in my adult life. I always knew that I would NEVER be the passive, getting married, bowing down sort of woman because my personality is just too strong for that. I knew that seeing the women in my life growing up, heavily influence this. I also knew that I would probably never get married based on these feelings.
All of this led to closing the session with the therapist mentioning my strength in personality, and my ability to go against everything I’d seen growing up to become my own person in spite of that. We briefly discussed the impact of going against the norm, and how that was viewed, by family.
“Do you like who you are?” Was asked, as we were winding down. My answer was, yes, of course. Although I think I have room for improvement, I genuinely like who I am. I’m honest, I don’t cheat, I don’t lie to people, I treat others well and I don’t hurt people. “What things would you like to improve?”
🔸I would like to focus more on developing better personal/romantic relationships.
🔸I would like to focus more on myself since I’ve spent most of my life focusing on everyone else.
🔸I would like to spend more time doing things that are enjoyable outside of working.
“Do you realize how many people don’t like who they are? Do you know how hard it is to grow up with your kind of obstacles and come out with a positive outlook on who you are?” My response was no I have no idea.
In my mind, I was thinking, of course, I like myself. I think I’m friggin awesome. I am in therapy because I want to become more awesome and spread more awesome. The world needs to be more awesome.
I would love to know your thoughts on therapy, and more about your journey in getting better in touch with who you are through therapy. Connect with me on social and share with me. Until next time, Happy Healing!
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