Last week was my 38th session of therapy, and on September 25th, that was the first anniversary of starting on my journey of healing. This week I gave a lot of thought to the overall progress I’ve made in therapy this year. So much of that is due to finding the RIGHT therapist at my first try.
Before my dad passed, I never seriously gave thought to therapy even though I knew it would be beneficial to me. Three months into my father’s illness, when he was on a decline, I recognized that it wasn’t going to end how my dad thought it would. I knew then that I was going to have a REALLY tough time with his death. So, grief counseling was my initial intent. However, when I started researching therapists, I made sure the person had a practice that focused on ALL of the areas that I felt could use attention if I decided to continue after dealing with the grief.
I contacted three therapists by email in March of 2019. I found all of them on Therapy for Black Girls then I checked social media presence and websites. When I saw my therapist rocking the “Rooting For Everyone Black” t-shirt, I IMMEDIATELY felt like THAT was my therapist.
One therapist got back to me immediately. The second emailed me a week later. [yikes] I got a notification that my therapist didn’t have any openings. SAD TIMES. Then life got super complicated with my father’s care. So I mentally didn’t have the bandwidth to even think about any of this. Fast forward to September of last year when I set up my first appointment. It is probably one of the BEST things I’ve done in life, on the list with real estate investment, having my son, and getting a graduate degree. That’s the level of impact it’s had on my life within this year.
REFLECTIONS FROM WEEK 38
Last week there was a break between sessions of four weeks, and it was the lengthiest break I’d ever had since I started going to therapy. That four-week hiatus was due to the holiday falling on the day that I usually schedule my session.
Honestly, I thought all would be smooth. I knew I wouldn’t fall apart, and I also was confident that I would be fine. Just as I thought, my life didn’t fall apart, but I did notice the difference in the weeks that I didn’t have that time to discuss the things that were happening in my life.
During my time off, I moved back into a comfort zone of hustling more and enjoying less of the simple things in life. Although the time I spent with this hustling project that is somewhat involved, I did take a breather between hustle mode. My ability to step away from this project to squeeze in some “me time” was 100% due to therapy.
When I start the week with a session, it seems to make the days that follow much smoother. That has especially been the case after March when Covid-19 became an issue, and the world imploded racially. I think it is so important, especially now that people have someone professional to speak with, that will listen and can offer guidance in areas where we need it.
I initially sought therapy because there were areas that I needed guidance that was beyond my expertise. I consider myself relatively intelligent in my lane, but I know I’m not good at everything. That’s when we have to recognize when it’s good to invite a professional into our world to help us navigate the challenging areas that are out of our lanes.
WEEK 38 TAKEAWAY
Therapy has become a part of helping me move through life using the things learned in sessions to help me have a more fulfilled existence. For me, I was maneuvering through life hustling, staying busy, doing so many things for others, and very little for myself. As a result of this, I felt as if I had lived enough and or experienced enough things that If I clocked out, I could say I had a fulfilled life. Not to say I thought of ending life only that, I was a bit bored with the monotony of things. I believe I had been merely existing instead of living life to the fullest.
After going to therapy, I realized that there are so many more things to experience. I need to do all of those things and more, because we literally have one life to live, and we should do all the things. ALL. THE. THINGS. I now understand how merely existing is not enough and how much I would have cheated myself had I not changed my path. So, therapy has literally been life-altering.
I have never felt so good mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Life would be pretty damn close to perfect if my fibroid battle was closer to ending. ANY. WHO, that’s another story.
MOVING FORWARD TO WEEK 39
The next session will involve some of the things that were my wins and challenges:
🔸 Continuing to find a balance of past and present
🔸 Juggling career, side-hustle projects and making it work
🔸 How unbalanced chakras are showing up in my life
🔸 Maybe, how I’m maneuvering through these single streets [L A W D]
I would love to know your thoughts on putting therapy session lessons to work in everyday situations. How are you taking what you’ve learned in therapy and applying them to your life in real-time? Reach out, let’s chat on FB, IG, and Twitter. Until then, Happy Healing and Happy Unpacking.
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